I Fell Asleep, Again!

Prior to 5 years ago I had been on an amazing inner spiritual journey. One in which I came to realize that the outer physical space I occupied was one of my choosing and creation. During this journey which lasted many years, I read every book, watched documentaries, researched, attended seminars, meditated and attended a Native American sweat (which in and of itself was out of this world...literally). I truly lived every day with the knowledge and understanding that we create our own reality and that thoughts truly do become things.

When I took a full-time job 5 years ago I really tried to carry that knowledge with me into the workplace. For the first couple of years I was able to stay true to myself and everyone around me. I never proselytized my beliefs and only spoke of them when conversation with co-workers warranted. Working within a predominantly christian environment and sharing such ideas was often futile so little by little I began to retreat both outwardly and inwardly. By years three through five I had forgotten all about the amazing journey I had been on and settled into the hum-drum life of being a corporate, or in this case government slave. Not wanting to be mocked or laughed at anymore I spent day after day just going into the office and doing my work and leaving and then going to bed every night dreading having to do it all over again tomorrow. 

When I lost that job a few months ago I felt such an intense and immediate sense of relief. But, as days have turned into weeks and weeks to months, so to has that relief turned into worry, then fear, then dread that I am not "gainfully employed." But not for a lack of trying though.

Then tonight I was flipping through Netflix looking for something meaningful to watch and I found a documentary called "Wake Up," no it's not about American politics or anything like that. It is about a man named Jonas Elrod who wakes up one day and begins seeing things like balls of light, geometric shapes, angels, demons and spirits. Not wanting anything to do with it he begins a journey to find out "what is wrong with him." He visits psychiatrists, neurologists, doctors, shamans, Native Americans, Buddhists and so on looking for answers. It wasn't very long into the documentary that memories of my own spiritual journey began to come back and I remember how amazing I thought existence was prior to the last 5 years. 

As I sit here and type this I am reminded that this has happened to me several times throughout this life; the whole knowing and forgetting thing. Three times that I can remember for certain. My hope is that this time I don't forget. I don't know what any of this means right now. I know there are some things I am going to have to learn over or rather, remember again. But I am again optimistic that tomorrow will be a new day and I can get back on the path.

So, If you have made it this far, bless you. Why am I telling you all of this? Well, I don't really know. I am on, what I call autopilot right now. I guess if I am typing it then maybe someone else needed to hear it. Maybe someone else needs to remember.

How Contagious Fear Can Be

Recently I had a conversation with a friend who was telling me about some of his fears. One of his fears was about sharks and even though he has lived near the ocean all of his life he would not go in the water. After further discussion he had agreed to face his fear and go swimming with me in the ocean the next day. We parted ways for the evening, I got in the car, and headed home excited about the next days adventure.

As I was driving along it didn’t take very long for that excitement to turn to fear. I started thinking that maybe he was right. “Maybe I shouldn’t be swimming in the ocean either because there ARE sharks in the ocean” I thought. “Anyday I could be attacked by a shark too!” Then I thought, “Oh no, what if we go swimming in the ocean tomorrow and all his fears come true and he did get attacked by a shark. I would feel horrible! I would feel guilty because it would have been all my fault for encouraging him to face his fears and swim in the ocean.” I wrestled with those thoughts of fear for several miles.

Here I was, a person that has always Loved to swim in the ocean, becoming more and more afraid of being attacked by a shark. There are family pictures of my mother holding me up by the arms as a baby and dangling me in the ocean water. Some of my best memories are memories of me and my family at the beach and swimming in the ocean. All of those wonderful memories were being destroyed in an instant by fear.

Then, like a bolt of lightning, it hit me how contagious fear IS!

This fear had not come from a television ad trying to convince me to buy a product. This fear had not come from a politician trying to get me to vote for them. This fear had come from two friends sharing a harmless conversation!

Your fears ARE what you make them!

The Death of the Ego

The Ego is dying. It is sitting in the corner of the room scared and sobbing. It does not understand why "I am doing this to it." "What's going to happen to me?" it sobs. "Where am I going to go? Am I going to cease to exist?" it asks.

"Yes" I reply.

Ego panics and becomes enraged. "How can you do this to me?" it screams. "You will be nothing without me!" it insists.

But I know differently. Once the ego is gone , the fear will be gone. The pain and suffering will be gone. This, I feel, may be the path to enlightenment, transcendence, a shift in consciousness or another major leap in human evolution.

I have felt, for quite sometime now, that the ego is dying on this planet, or at the very least being altered.

Those who are heavily invested in the ego are going to find the next few years as a time of great confusion, insanity, chaos and terror. Some will call it "the apocalypse" or "Armageddon." Millions, or possibly billions, will drop to their knees and pray to as many gods and beg to be spared. The great leaders will demand respect and try, with great force, to stop the coming flood, to no avail.

Are you ready? Then do it now! Awaken and begin the shift!

Death to the ego! The shift is coming! Long live the Light!

The Reality of Fear

Fear! Why do people need fear in their lives? Why do they seem to have to have it? Why are people so afraid of leaving fear behind? What are they truly afraid of?

I pondered this one evening while watching television when I saw a commercial advertising the horror movie Quarantine, followed by two video game commercials advertising their latest monster thrillers. There must be a psychological reason or addiction to need to stay in fear!

One possible reason could be that they do not even know that they are afraid. If they acknowledge that they are afraid they have to deal with their true reality and the reality is that which you fear becomes the reality of that which you fear.

Let me say that again.

That which you fear becomes the reality of that which you fear. Your reality has become this perpetual life of fear that you created, and continue to create.

Leaving fear behind would mean facing the unknown. It is very difficult for most people to choose the unknown over the known. No matter how bad the known is, for most people it is a safer choice than choosing the unknown.

Add to that, the constant barrage of fear-based messages from corporate-controlled news outlets which feed off of the fear then regurgitate it to the starving baby chicks addicted to daily doses of anxiety-inducing drama. The governments spoon feed you terror with a shovel and the corporate advertisements use depictions of frightful situations or create "unfortunate scenarios" so you will "buy into" their rhetoric or purchase their product which just happens to be the needed solution to the scenario they just concocted. It is all a highly-advanced system of classic brainwashing.

The fear mongers use these tactics to trick a large portion of modern humans into believing that you need every last one of them; that you cannot survive without them. The governments scare you into believing that they are your protectors. The churches scare you into believing that they are your savior. And, the corporations are the provider of things that you do not even know you need until they tell you that you do. Or, scare you into believing you do.

In truth, fear keeps you in need, period!

The idea of leaving fear behind would require you to leave behind your need for those protectors, saviors, and providers. This would then require you to stand up and become accountable for not only your thoughts and actions, but your thoughts and actions in the collective consciousness, as well.

If humanity is to have any chance at evolving its consciousness to the next level, we must awaken from this fear-induced coma and take an active role in creating a reality without fear.